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The BeHappy! Newsletter, Issue #021
August 23, 2012
If you’re one of the hundreds of new daily visitors to BeHappy101.com or a new subscriber to this BeHappy! Newsletter... welcome aboard!
I’m Jimmy, and my mission is to improve your life dramatically by making it a bit happier - or, better yet, a lot happier - everyday.
I am a doctor, corporate executive, entrepreneur, author, and speaker. My wife (Jill), our five-year-old daughter (Joie), and our two-year-old daughter (Jae) live in Tampa Florida and Newport Beach California.
Through this newsletter, my website, my books, E-Coaching, and other BeHappy! products, I am committed to improving the lives of as many people as possible. So, I would love to hear from you on how your life has changed by using the BeHappy! system, or how I can help improve your life more by making the system even better. Just click here to contact me and I’ll respond to you personally as soon as possible – or just give me your happiness tips, comments, suggestions, stories, or thoughts to share with others.
Here’s to your happiness and to having the kind of life you want to have!
BeHappy! my friends
(for new subscribers)
The purpose of this newsletter is to provide a regular and consistent supplement to the action-oriented process found within my website - www.behappy101.com - and in my first book, simply called BeHappy!
It is intended to make a powerful contribution to the amount of joy and fulfillment in your daily life by providing regular tools, reminders, and strategies to:
Since my goal is to help make people happier, however, it is best to get the book, BeHappy! to use along with the website to achieve maximum benefit from the plan (yes, that’s partly a sales pitch — but it’s true).
Follow Up from the Last Edition of
The BeHappy! Newsletter
As part of this concept that happiness actually leads to better health, so too do our beliefs lead us to better health and longevity. That's partly because there is plenty of evidence to support a very strong mind-body connection and that we are essentially "programmed" by our beliefs and rules to affect our health and lifespan.
If we “believe” (consciously or subconsciously), for example, that we will get a certain disease or live to a certain age, there will be a much greater chance of that situation becoming a reality than if we believe (truly believe) that we will not get that disease and that we will live much longer. Surely, it’s not guaranteed - and proper nutrition, exercise, and genetics also play a role - but there is plenty of evidence to prove the correlation.
So, have you started to change your beliefs as described in the action section of the June edition? Did you read the Deepak Chopra book, Ageless Body, Timeless Mind? Did you start to reprogram your mind using the strategies suggested to slow down your aging process? Are you exercising regularly and eating a healthy, nutritious, disease-fighting diet? Are you also making sure to nourish your mind with happiness – which will bring all this together to make you healthier and live longer?
If you’re doing any of these things – even if you’ve just started – I assure you, it can change your health dramatically. If you have not started doing these things, get started now! Please. It’s literally a matter of life and death … and happiness!!
For those who are new subscribers, or who just didn’t take the actions recommended, take the time to go back and do it now. Trust me, it will have a very positive effect on your life.
You can read the June edition by clicking here
Now, on to the topic for this edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter...
What Do You Expect?
As most of you probably know, the 2012 Summer Olympics recently took place in London. I love the Olympics. Ever since I was a young boy I have watched the amazing athletes who make it to this global event perform at the highest level humanly possible.
The Olympics raise some interesting questions about happiness. Think about it. The athletes who make it to the Olympics have spent most of their lives focused on their primary goal of getting to this event, which for many is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
Just getting there is an incredible accomplishment – and all of these athletes are surely happy just to be there. But, many of these athletes have higher goals and expectations than just to be there. Many are there, not only to compete, but to win. So, from an “emotional” perspective, it can get much more complicated than just being happy to participate.
As just mentioned, those who get there have likely devoted most of their lives to their goal. They have spent many, many hours every single day dedicated to their mission, usually enduring significant pain and sacrifice due to the nature of their sport. Then, they get there and they have to compete with the best athletes in the world – and what if they fail to win a gold medal (first place), or even win a medal at all? Can this effect their overall happiness negatively?
Take Jordyn Wieber, the World Champion American gymnast, who made it to this year's Olympics and was expected to win a gold medal, but then failed to even advance to the finals and so she was eliminated completely from the possibility of a medal. What a disappointment! She was in tears, and obviously very upset. She was one of the favorites to win gold and now she had no chance to win at all. One announcer said “this will surely live with her forever” – perhaps as a regret or possibly even a lifelong negative memory.
Similarly, there are some athletes who are upset, angry and perhaps "unhappy" if they “fail” to win a gold medal (a silver medal - second place - is considered a failure) while there are those many athletes who are ecstatic to just win a bronze medal.
As I said, it gets complicated. Part of it has to do with expectations. If you are one of the best in the world and “expect” to win a gold medal, and then only get silver, you could view it as a failure, and be unhappy about it. We saw several silver medal winners in tears (of unhappiness) because they viewed the outcome as a “failure”. But if you are just happy to be there and don't even expect to win a medal, but end up coming in 3rd (winning the bronze medal), what a success!! (we also saw many bronze medal winners in tears of happiness)
Well, it gets even more complicated than that, because this doesn't mean we should lower our expectations...
The other part of the issue relates to achieving our goals, which should be set high. Many people don't even set goals, and for those who do, many never achieve those goals.
If you watched the Olympics, you probably know that Michael Phelps, the U.S. champion swimmer, now has won more medals than any Olympic athlete in history. He has 22 Olympic medals, 18 of which are gold. Amazing! He is the most successful Olympic athlete of all time. But he would likely never have achieved this result if he didn't have very difficult goals and high expectations for success. Yes, goals are critical to success – and even possibly to maximum happiness in life.
So now the big question (to make things even more complicated). Is Michael Phelps happy?
The answer: first, it depends ... and second, time will tell.
This two-fold answer relates to one of the most important first steps in the “Formula” for achieving total happiness in life – which is our own personal Definition of Happiness.
Michael Phelps, just like everyone else, must have his own Definition of Happiness well thought out. Almost surely, just the fact that he has won all those medals – and obviously achieved many of his goals - does not guarantee happiness. No one thing does. Money doesn’t. A great relationship doesn’t. Perfect health doesn't. And, winning more Olympic medals than anyone else doesn’t.
It takes a carefully considered overall Definition of Happiness for our entire life which we must each assess for ourselves, just to have the opportunity to be totally happy.
Yes, just the opportunity.
That's because once we have our definition, we must also have a plan to make sure we make that definition a reality for ourselves throughout our lives. And, everyone’s definition is different. Furthermore, even though most people think they know what would make them happy in life (in other words, they think they know their definition of happiness) most don’t really know it.
There are countless examples of famous people who thought a certain level of wealth, fame, and/or success would equate to life happiness. Michael Jackson, John Bellushi, Whitney Houston, and Junior Seau (the former pro football star who recently committed suicide) are a few examples. All died young due, at least partly, to the inner struggles they faced and, I believe, some degree of unhappiness – even though they seemed to “have it all”.
If these people had thought through their own personal Definition of Happiness early on in their lives, and created a plan to achieve that definition for themselves, they would most likely still be with us today. Not only that, they would have been happier, more balanced, and more fulfilled people – probably with even greater success and wealth than they experienced in their careers.
So, what is your personal Definition of Happiness? What are your goals and expectations for your life? Well, let’s get to the “action” section to start a process to answer those questions.
And if you want more help, please go to BeHappy101.com, get the book, BeHappy!, or take advantage of my free coaching plan by clicking here and I'll help you personally to get started on a plan to make happiness a "habit".
So, now it’s time to take action toward addressing this issue of health for the next 60 days.
BeHappy! ACTIONS TO TAKE UNTIL THE NEXT ISSUE OF THIS NEWSLETTER
Like everything in life, the old saying, “practice makes perfect” applies to happiness, too. By using the tools and concepts in the book, BeHappy! - and applying the principles found at BeHappy101.com and in this bi-monthly newsletter - you'll get the coaching and the “practice” you need to lead the happiest possible life.
It takes daily action to get “perfect” at it, though.
So, if you have read previous editions of The BeHappy! Newsletter you know that every issue provides some simple action-oriented exercises for the next two months (until the next edition of the newsletter) which relate to the main subject of this edition of the newsletter to help make happiness a habit.
Just a few minutes of focus every day and you’ll be laying the foundation for the happiest possible life - both for yourself and for those you love.
If you do these things, I can promise you’ll notice a big difference in the quality of your life.
You will BeHappy!
Actions for the next 60 days:
Take these actions over the next sixty days and by the time you receive the next edition of the BeHappy! Newsletter (around mid-October), you should be on a path to higher expectations for your life and a better sense of what would make you truly happy.
Actions to Take:
We covered the concept of creating your personal Definition of Happiness in my year-long series which went through "The Happiness Formula". So, the first action to take right now is to go back and review that edition of the newsletter and either reevaluate and revise the Definition of Happiness you created then (if necessary) or, if you didn’t do it at that time, do it now. Also, if you became a subscriber to this newsletter after that edition was published last year in August (2011), go back and read it now and take the actions recommended. This is an essential first step in anyone’s potential to live the happiest possible life. Just click here to go directly to that edition of the newsletter.
The next action to take in this process is to assess your life’s goals and expectations in the context of your personal Definition of Happiness.
Do you have your life goals written down? Do you have specific expectations for the future, especially as related to your Definition of Happiness and your life’s goals?
Goal setting is the subject for a different place, but please look into the process by clicking here if you don’t have specific, written out goals.
We will explore these action items in the next edition of the newsletter and, as mentioned at the beginning of this edition, will start a series on improving relationships.
The main messages for this edition are:
WHAT'S NEW AT BeHappy101.com:
Every issue of this newsletter will keep you up to date on new stuff at BeHappy101.com so you can get maximum benefit from the BeHappy! system. You can access any of these quickly by just clicking on the links in the list below.
Here's what's new at BeHappy101.com:
So until the next edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter around the middle of October...
Thanks for being a loyal subscriber and...
BeHappy! my friends
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