Volume 017
December 2011
Happy Holidays!

Hi there...

If you’re one of the hundreds of new daily visitors to BeHappy101.com or a new subscriber to this BeHappy! newsletter, welcome!

I’m Jimmy, and my mission is to improve your life by making it a bit happier - or, better yet, a lot happier - everyday.

I am a doctor, “rejuvenating” corporate executive, entrepreneur, author, and speaker. My wife (Jill), our five-year-old daughter (Joie), and our two-year-old daughter (Jae) live in Tampa Florida and Newport Beach California.

Through this newsletter, my website, my books, E-Coaching, and other BeHappy! products, I am committed to improving the lives of as many people as possible. So, I would love to hear from you on how your life has changed by using the BeHappy! system, or how I can help improve your life more by making the system even better.
Join “The Happiness Group”
Just click here to see a 11/2 minute video introduction to the group. Then, go to facebook and search "The Happiness Group" to join.

Please go to BeHappy101.com to provide your happiness tips, comments, suggestions, stories, or thoughts and I’ll respond to you personally – as appropriate - as soon as possible.

Here’s to your happiness and to having the kind of life you want to have!

BeHappy! my friends

Inside this Issue

Introduction to The BeHappy! Newsletter (for new subscribers)

Happiness Facts

Follow Up to the Last Edition’s “Actions”

Initial "Holiday Happiness" Tips

Are You As Happy As You Can Be? (Part 5)

Actions for the Next 60 Days to BeHappy!

What's New at BeHappy101.com

(for new subscribers)

The purpose of this newsletter is to provide a regular and consistent supplement to the action-oriented process found within my website - www.behappy101.com - and in my first book, simply called BeHappy!

It is intended to make a powerful contribution to the amount of joy and fulfillment in your daily life by providing regular tools, reminders, and strategies to: This is far beyond a “How To” concept. It is rather a “Do” system, which, when used in conjunction with the BeHappy! book, helps create your own personal “Happiness Plan” for your life. If you want a template or “blueprint” for this Happiness Plan, Click here and you can get it free.

Since my goal is to help make people happier, however, it is best to get the book to use along with the website to achieve maximum benefit from the plan (yes, that’s partly a sales pitch — but it’s true).

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MY GUARANTEE TO YOU: While most of the information at behappy101.com is free, I want you to BeHappy! with anything you purchase on this site; our reputation depends on it. Nothing is more important to me personally than for you to be completely satisfied with the information you receive. So if you are not satisfied with anything you buy on this site, for any reason whatsoever, simply contact me and I will have a refund check cut and sent to you immediately.

  • The online dating industry generates $1.8 billion per year in the United States alone.

  • Studies show that happiness is contagious and that potential dates find it hard to walk away from happy people. One of the biggest turn-offs during a date is negativity.

  • Men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer than those who don't.

  • Having a romantic relationship makes both genders happier. The stronger the commitment, the greater the happiness!

Some Initial "Holiday Happiness" Tips

It’s the holiday season around the world, and you know what that means. For many people, it’s “the most wonderful time of the year”. For others, it’s not so great. For just about everyone, though, it can be hectic and stressful.

Make this holiday season joyful by following the BeHappy101.com guide to "Holiday Happiness". There are some quick tips below to get started. Also, For more detailed plans to create the happiest holiday season possible, go to The BeHappy! Blog starting December 11th for weekly strategies to make the holidays less stressful and more enjoyable.

Tips for Holiday Happiness
  1. Create a “holiday plan”: Make a plan for the next month and schedule some relaxing and fun things on your calendar. Take in a movie, have a barbeque night with your family, or whatever gives you some enjoyment.
  2. Allow for down time: Make sure you have time allotted in your week that isn’t scheduled. Take time to sit and read or walk through the neighborhood.
  3. Respect tradition: Many families have holiday traditions which have been passed on for generations. Respect those traditions, but don’t necessarily feel bound to them exactly as they have always existed if they create undue or excess stress. Over the years, people’s needs change. Gifts for everyone, for example, may not be necessary anymore if the kids have grown - especially if money is tight.
  4. Keep expectations realistic: One of the hardest parts of the holiday season is that, while it can be a magical time of year, things aren’t always perfect in the real world. Anticipate the usual problems (like not enough time to get everything done, arguments between family members, etc.) and settle on strategies to avoid these issues in advance.
  5. Manage your own stress proactively: Determine what you need to keep yourself feeling energized and engaged. Continue your exercise program or adapt it to your holiday schedule. Also, avoid putting on extra weight by controlling portions and choosing any high calorie treats carefully. Make sure they are worth it.
  6. Reflect on the true meaning of the season: Don't sweat the small stuff, like making your house perfect for a gathering. Keep reminding yourself about the wonderful meaning behind why the world celebrates this time of year.
  7. Avoid overspending: Create a holiday budget and stick to it. Definitely don't run up the credit card balance such that it takes the whole next year to pay it off. This creates even more stress throughout the year and makes you less and less able to enjoy the holidays year after year.
  8. Share the workload: Divide up holiday tasks amongst family members (decorating, shopping, cooking, etc.). If you're the host of a party, consider having everyone bring something. Don’t take on the entire burden yourself – it’s more fun when everyone takes part.
  9. Keep it simple: Pare down to the essentials and avoid cluttering up your holiday with too many activities or trying to make everything perfect.
  10. Reflect on what you are grateful for in life: Gratitude is the first step in any happiness plan, including a holiday happiness plan. Focus on what makes you feel grateful ... your home, job, health, friends and family. Take time to appreciate what you have right now and let others know how you feel.
Follow Up from the Last Edition of
The BeHappy! Newsletter

The previous edition of this newsletter in October was all about “contribution”, the 3rd component of our year-long, 7-part program designed to provide a “simple formula” for increasing your happiness significantly. Did you take the actions described? If so, I’ll bet you feel different about life as compared to just two short months ago. If you didn’t take the actions described, why not? Did you read the October edition of the newsletter? What about the other previous parts of this series. If not, it would be best for you to go back and read (or review) the other parts of the series to get the most out of this process. You can read the introduction to this series (the February edition) by clicking here, the first step of the process (the May edition) by clicking here, the August edition by clicking here, and the October edition by clicking here.

If you read the October edition and followed the actions provided, you have a better understanding of the concept of contribution and how being - or becoming - a contributor can lead to increased happiness. How do you feel since you started making contribution a habit? Nearly everyone feels “happier”, regardless of the size or scope of the contribution. And, while it is obviously not the only factor which determines your overall happiness, it definitely is an essential part of this process toward understanding and implementing your life’s “Happiness Formula”.

So, if you are not a contributor and/or you didn’t do the exercises to help make contribution a habit in your life, just do it! Do it now, before going on to the next part of the process. I promise it will change your life.

Now, on to the topic for this edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter...

Are You As Happy As You Can Be? (Part 5)

In this year-long (7-Part) series, which started this past February and will go until next April, the objective is to help you be as happy as you can possibly be. And so, if the answer to the above question is “no” (you don't feel you're as happy as you could be) then you’re on the right track here to change the answer to “yes” and now it’s time to take the next step in the process.

The Next Part of "The Happiness Formula"

Once again, the “Happiness Formula” I've created is ...

H = (G + DH + C + 3R) ÷ 6

... where “H” stands for Happiness (described in the February edition of the newsletter), “G” stands for Gratitude (described in the May edition), “DH” represents your Definition of Happiness (described in the August edition) and “C” refers to “Contribution” (described in the October edition).

Now, it’s time to get into the “3R” part of the equation. The 3R refers to what I call “The 3 R’s of Happiness” (from my book, BeHappy!). The 3 R’s refers to Relationships, Rules, and Regrets. And, for the remaining 3 steps of the process (this one, and then Parts 6 and 7 in February and April) we’ll explore each of these “3 R’s”, one at a time.

While every component of “The Happiness Formula” is important to our ability to live the happiest possible life, if you do nothing else to help increase joy, passion, fulfillment, and peace-of-mind, you must understand and manage these “3 R’s”. These are fundamental and foundational components of happiness which relate to everyone, at least to some degree. So if you really want to be happier, make sure to take this edition and the next two editions very seriously and I can assure you, your life will be better.

So, let’s get right into the first “R”, Relationships...

If you have read my book or spent any time exploring BeHappy101.com, you know that relationships form what I call a “happiness loop”, so to speak, which can either enhance happiness or destroy happiness, depending on how you manage the process - especially if your Definition of Happiness includes anything about intimacy, family, friends, finding your soul mate, or other types of relationship issues, this area could have a huge impact on your happiness.

And it’s not as simple or straightforward as you may think. Because in reality, you can’t have the best possible relationships without being happy first – and, you likely can’t be completely happy if you don’t have great relationships. As I said, it’s a “happiness loop”, which is not easy to understand or follow.

The key here is to create momentum within this "loop" in the positive direction and it will fuel itself toward greater and greater happiness, while simultaneously developing better and better relationships.

As with many of the concepts related to "the pursuit of happiness", I can’t fully develop the whole relationship model here in a newsletter (which is supposed to be brief, but always seems to end up longer than I intend). But, the actions below will start the process, and if you want more help, please go to BeHappy101.com, get the book, BeHappy! (there is a whole chapter devoted to this, and 3 full chapters on the “3 R’s”), or take advantage of my free coaching plan. Any of these will take you to a whole new level of joy and fulfillment by connecting better in all your relationships.

“People love others not for who they are, but for how they make them feel.”
- Irwin Federman
So, now it’s time to take action toward addressing this first of the 3 R’s - Relationships.

So please read on and continue with the "Actions" described below to help you take this next step in our “year-long” happiness process which, if you really do it, will change your life forever.


Like everything in life, the old saying, “practice makes perfect” applies to happiness, too. By using the tools and concepts in BeHappy! - and applying the principles on my website (www.behappy101.com) and in this bi-monthly newsletter - you'll get the coaching and the “practice” you need to lead the happiest possible life. It takes daily action to get “perfect” at it, though.

So, if you have read previous editions of The BeHappy! Newsletter you know that every issue provides some simple action-oriented exercises for the next two months (until the next edition of the newsletter) which relate to the main "subject" of this edition of the newsletter to help make happiness a habit.

Just a few minutes of focus every day and you’ll be laying the foundation for the happiest possible life - both for yourself and for those you love.

If you do these things, I can promise you’ll notice a big difference in the quality of your life.

You will BeHappy!

Actions for the next 60 days:

Take these actions over the next sixty days and by the time you receive the next edition of the BeHappy! Newsletter (around the beginning of February), you will, at the very least, have a completely new “plan” for relationship success, and perhaps much, much more.

Also, since we'll be into the New Year by the time the next edition comes out, please also go to BeHappy101.com over the next few weeks for some additional “actions” to take regarding subjects like:
  • New Year’s Resolutions
  • Goal Setting for 2012 and Beyond
  • More “Holiday Happiness” Strategies
  • Making 2012 Your Best Year Ever
Yes, by the time you get the next edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter you will have a whole new perspective on relationships and will be on your way to better, higher quality personal connections of all kinds.

Actions to Take:

Since all the actions you could take to create better relationships can't be fully explored here, these are the ones I feel are most important to start with:

Be Happy

I'm sorry to do this to you (well, actually, I'm not) because the first thing anyone MUST do to have the best relationships possible is "simply" to be happy. There is nothing more attractive than a happy person and people gravitate towards positive, upbeat, happy people. It's really the start of the whole "happiness loop" I mentioned before.

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The first "action" to take, therefore, is to basically follow this "Happiness Formula", which will make you a happier person. You will be amazed at the "side effects" related to relationships. The relationships you already have will improve dramatically, and, if you're looking for that perfect relationship, you will be in a much better position to find it.

This is not some vague theory or wierd magic. This has been proven. Happy people have better, more, and deeper relationships. It's that simple.

So, really, by reading this newsletter (and the previous editions in this year-long series which started last February) you are taking the first action needed for better relationships...which is to be happy.

Be Proactive

Now, surely just being happy isn't all that's required to improve your marriage, resolve issues with family and friends, or find your soul mate. There are many more things we can do to develop deeper, long-lasting, fulfilling relationships. And so, the second action to take for the next 60 days involves being proactive with the relationships you already have, as well as in your search for a new, intimate, perhaps life-long relationship.

With your current relationships, develop a plan for nurturing and/or improving them. Go to lunch with a friend or relative once a month. Schedule "date night" with your spouse (especially if you have children). Go visit or cook dinner for your parents and grandparents regularly. Take each of your children out regularly for a special one-on-one evening or event. In other words, do anything that shows those you love that you care about them. Even a brief note (even if it's an e-mail) can show people you care, just by saying you're thinking of them.

Do one or more of each of these "proactive" ideas - or think of some of your own - over the next 60 days. Remember, this is the "action" section of the Newsletter, so take the action. Be proactive!

Now, if you are looking for an intimate, one-on-one relationship (whether for the long-term or just for a date), being proactive is also important. Again, though, going back to happiness, your success in finding the right person, going on a successful date, or even connecting with someone at a bar, party, online, or other social gathering will increase tremendously if you are positive, happy and upbeat. Believe me, people will notice and be attracted to you. So, if you are going to be proactive, give yourself a much better chance of success by being happy.

Next, be proactive in your actions. In other words, get out there. Participate in social events. Put yourself in social settings. Join a group, attend social events, go to spiritual gatherings, or even go to bars, restaurants, or clubs. Explore the online or offline dating services. Whatever works for you is what you should do ("do" is the operative word here). Again, take action. And, if you combine "being proactive" with "being happy", your chances of finding AND connecting with the "perfect" person for you goes up exponentially.

Other Relationship Tips and Strategies

I'm sure you know that the concept of relationships can be complicated. Great relationships can light up your life and bad relationships can destroy your ability to be as happy as you could be. And, since relationships are one of the fundamental "3 R's" of happiness, it's important to explore this area further if you want to have the best relationships possible. So, go to the relationship section of BeHappy101.com for more tips and strategies. Also, check out some of the resources listed in the box to the right for some professional, expert advice on various relationship topics.

As always, we’ll look back on this 60-day action plan in the next edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter at the beginning of February - where we'll then take the next step toward making profound improvements in your happiness – and your life - by exploring the next component of "The Happiness Formula" ... the second of the “3R’s”, which is about rules. Also, when that next edition of the newsletter comes out, we’ll be through the holiday season and a month into 2012. So, as usual when we get into a new year, we'll touch on some ways to make this next year your best, happiest year ever. In the meantime, make sure to check out the BeHappy! Blog for weekly holiday tips through the first of January.

WHAT'S NEW AT BeHappy101.com:

Every issue of this newsletter will keep you up to date on new stuff at BeHappy101.com so you can get maximum benefit from the BeHappy! system. You can access any of these quickly by just clicking on the links in the list below.

Here's what's new at BeHappy101.com:

If the information here at BeHappy101.com helps you and you'd like to make a donation to help make others happy, please click on the "DONATE" button below to make a contribution. The amount you give is entirely up to you, and would be greatly appreciated. A portion of the proceeds will used to contribute to the happiness of others.

  • The "BeHappy! Fast" Button: Click on this button on the right (or from the homepage of the website) to get a FREE trial of The BeHappy! Program - a six month program designed to guide you, step-by-step, to your happiest possible life. It is a great supplement to the website, this newsletter and my personal coaching plan. Click on the "BeHappy! Fast" button on the right now to check it out. It's completely risk free.

  • Several new "Happiness Products" have been added to the website. There are products for making more money, improving your relationships, reducing stress, raising happier children, learning to meditate, losing weight, and more.

  • The opportunity to join the new Happiness Group". Just click here to see a 11/2 minute video introduction to the group. Then, go to facebook and search "The Happiness Group" to join.

  • Several important new blog posts to add to your "happiness toolbox".

  • New Quotes, Poems, and Jokes to help inspire and motivate you, or just make you laugh.

And much, much more.

So until the next edition of The BeHappy! Newsletter around the first week of February...

Thanks for being a loyal subscriber and...

BeHappy! my friends

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